well we survived christmas. at least so far. dad's back is full of staples- but he is walking , the dog did NOT knock over the christmas tree (thank goodness), and rachel's heart is on the mend.
memorable tidbits from christmas vacation:
-so we got an elevator lift installed in the new house. it was much needed since the grandparents can't hike up tons of stairs and dad just had back surgery. however, the current temporary elevator is not ours exactly. the welder apparently didn't come through on his end of the bargain, so our elevator guy stole our lift from the nuns. (so we could use it while the grandparents are here) i wish i could make this stuff up, but i can't.
elevator guy: "Since the "sisters" are on christmas vacation, i figured they wouldn't need it for a few days while ya'll used it," he tells us. "and don't worry about it being able to lift everybody. the sisters are pretty good sized, so i figure it can lift ya'll."
i don't know where these supposed hefty nuns are that are missing an elevator, but i hope they don't come back anytime soon.
-So I got assigned the task of picking up the ham from the Honey Baked Ham store in West Ashley. After sitting in an hour of traffic, I finally get to the store only to find that they have posted a cop outside the honey baked ham store. Is there a problem with people stealing hams at the holidays??? Or do people have violent outbursts when they run out of bread or cranberry relish or something? I am not sure, but the Honey Baked Cop looked pretty serious to me.
-And finally, quotable quote from my sister:
(While watching the news)
Rachel: "Who is this Gooliani they are talking about? That sounds like a kind of pasta or something."
Me: "Its Giuliani Rach. Not Goo. And he's trying to be the president."
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
and the award goes to.....
quote of the year:
"yeah...he's kind of like margerine in that way."
-cheryl woods
"yeah...he's kind of like margerine in that way."
-cheryl woods
Sunday, December 02, 2007
shane and shane
hear my prayer, give Your ear
in Your faithfulness answer me
in Your righteousness do not judge
for no one is righteous
teach me to do Your will Lord
for you are my God
Your Spirit is good
lead me on level ground Lord
for You are my God
Your Spirit is good
it is good
revive me, revive me
not for me but for Your name
in Your mercy deliver me from my enemies
revive me
i rememebr days of old
Your works i meditate oh Lord
i consider all the works of Your hands
i lift up my hands to you, my soul longs
revive me
-Psalm 143
in Your faithfulness answer me
in Your righteousness do not judge
for no one is righteous
teach me to do Your will Lord
for you are my God
Your Spirit is good
lead me on level ground Lord
for You are my God
Your Spirit is good
it is good
revive me, revive me
not for me but for Your name
in Your mercy deliver me from my enemies
revive me
i rememebr days of old
Your works i meditate oh Lord
i consider all the works of Your hands
i lift up my hands to you, my soul longs
revive me
-Psalm 143
Saturday, December 01, 2007
storms on the horizon
at the greer house, when it rains....it pours.
ya'll pray for us. its gonna be an interesting holiday season.
ya'll pray for us. its gonna be an interesting holiday season.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
distant acts of charity
Below: some discussion about how most of us are nowhere close to living the type of life that Christ called us to live. It makes me feel real selfish. I'm trying to figure out what to do about it.
"The matter is quite simple. The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand, we are obliged to act accordingly. Take any words in the New Testament and forget everything except pledging yourself to act accordingly. My God, you will say, if I do that my whole life will be ruined. How would I ever get on in the world? Herein lies the real place of Christian scholarship. Christian scholarship is the Church's prodigious invention to defend itself against the Bible, to ensure that we can continue to be good Christians without the Bible coming too close. Oh, priceless scholarship, what would we do without you? Dreadful it is to fall into the hands of the living God. Yes, it is even dreadful to be alone with the New Testament" - Soren Kierkegaard
"Its much more comfortable to depersonalize the poor so we don't feel responsible for the catastrophic human failure that results in someone sleeping on the street while people have spare bedrooms in their homes. We can volunteer in a social program or distribute excess food and clothing through organizations and never have to open up our homes, our beds, our dinner tables. When we get to heaven, we will be separated into those sheep and goats Jesus talks about in Matthew 25 based on how we cared for the least among us. I'm just not convinced that Jesus is going to say, "When I was hungry, you gave a check to the United Way and they fed me," or, "When I was naked, you donated clothes to the Salvation Army and they clothed me." Jesus is not seeking distant acts of charity. He seeks concrete acts of love: "you fed me...you visited me in prison...you welcomed me into your home...you clothed me." - Shane Claiborne
"The matter is quite simple. The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand, we are obliged to act accordingly. Take any words in the New Testament and forget everything except pledging yourself to act accordingly. My God, you will say, if I do that my whole life will be ruined. How would I ever get on in the world? Herein lies the real place of Christian scholarship. Christian scholarship is the Church's prodigious invention to defend itself against the Bible, to ensure that we can continue to be good Christians without the Bible coming too close. Oh, priceless scholarship, what would we do without you? Dreadful it is to fall into the hands of the living God. Yes, it is even dreadful to be alone with the New Testament" - Soren Kierkegaard
"Its much more comfortable to depersonalize the poor so we don't feel responsible for the catastrophic human failure that results in someone sleeping on the street while people have spare bedrooms in their homes. We can volunteer in a social program or distribute excess food and clothing through organizations and never have to open up our homes, our beds, our dinner tables. When we get to heaven, we will be separated into those sheep and goats Jesus talks about in Matthew 25 based on how we cared for the least among us. I'm just not convinced that Jesus is going to say, "When I was hungry, you gave a check to the United Way and they fed me," or, "When I was naked, you donated clothes to the Salvation Army and they clothed me." Jesus is not seeking distant acts of charity. He seeks concrete acts of love: "you fed me...you visited me in prison...you welcomed me into your home...you clothed me." - Shane Claiborne
Monday, September 24, 2007
you know you're out in the country when...
so sometimes i have to travel to really really really small towns to do presentations at a high school (like today). here are some signs that you are out in the stix:
-You pass 6 taxidermy places within 20 minutes of each other
-All the streets are named after produce, animals, or farm equipment (Ex: "Blueberry Lane," "Watermelon Road," "Kicking Horse Circle" and "Tractor Drive"....not even kidding).
-The speed limit for the whole town never exceeds 30 miles an hour (and sometimes gets down to 15mph) and there is only 1 stoplight within a 30-40 mile radius.
-You lose all cell phone service from the moment you get off the I-26 exit.
Just a few tidbits from my day..... :)
-You pass 6 taxidermy places within 20 minutes of each other
-All the streets are named after produce, animals, or farm equipment (Ex: "Blueberry Lane," "Watermelon Road," "Kicking Horse Circle" and "Tractor Drive"....not even kidding).
-The speed limit for the whole town never exceeds 30 miles an hour (and sometimes gets down to 15mph) and there is only 1 stoplight within a 30-40 mile radius.
-You lose all cell phone service from the moment you get off the I-26 exit.
Just a few tidbits from my day..... :)
Thursday, September 13, 2007
long time gone
okay okay.....so i haven't abandoned the blog i promise. my work computer has it blocked so I have to make an extra special effort to get on my old laptop to write anything. there have been some complaints from the lack of blogging (well, only by my dad and rachel....who says she needs something to read in accounting). so this one's for you kid.
i just finished reading a book a few weeks ago called "the irrestibable revolution." wimbo read it and said it was awesome. it is.
it is one of those books that just changes you. and you don't really know where to begin in the process of making all of these changes. there will be some quotes from it coming soon....i promise. the writer basically talks about how we really don't live how jesus challenges us to in the bible. how we have watered down the gospel so much to fit in with our often self-righteous habits....and how jesus disliked that most about the pharisees. how often are we spending time with the poor? with hurting people? dying people? how come we have extra bedrooms but we let homeless people sleep on the streets... and then feel good about ourselves for volunteering at the soup kitchen for a night? jesus didn't tell us to give money to a good charity.....he told us to love people. and loving them is not distantly throwing a few dollars or a free meal their way. it is spending time with them and investing in their search for the Lord. and i really think the church as a whole would really change if we stopped always hoarding the gobs of information we learn about Jesus that we use for making us feel better about ourselves and instead we sometimes take the knowledge of Jesus' love and shared it with other people.
i don't know. i have just been thinking about all this a lot. and its taking a while to process how i should be living it out in my own daily life.
i just finished reading a book a few weeks ago called "the irrestibable revolution." wimbo read it and said it was awesome. it is.
it is one of those books that just changes you. and you don't really know where to begin in the process of making all of these changes. there will be some quotes from it coming soon....i promise. the writer basically talks about how we really don't live how jesus challenges us to in the bible. how we have watered down the gospel so much to fit in with our often self-righteous habits....and how jesus disliked that most about the pharisees. how often are we spending time with the poor? with hurting people? dying people? how come we have extra bedrooms but we let homeless people sleep on the streets... and then feel good about ourselves for volunteering at the soup kitchen for a night? jesus didn't tell us to give money to a good charity.....he told us to love people. and loving them is not distantly throwing a few dollars or a free meal their way. it is spending time with them and investing in their search for the Lord. and i really think the church as a whole would really change if we stopped always hoarding the gobs of information we learn about Jesus that we use for making us feel better about ourselves and instead we sometimes take the knowledge of Jesus' love and shared it with other people.
i don't know. i have just been thinking about all this a lot. and its taking a while to process how i should be living it out in my own daily life.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
beginning on my quest to become paula deen.....
just kidding. well....half kidding anyway.
wow, i have not written on here in a long time.
i can't help it. my work computer won't let me blog b/c it has it blocked. and since this is the first week i have been home in forever, i haven't had a chance.
(haha...i talk like people other than my dad actually read this. i love you dad).
my first week of my new job was spent in pittsburgh. i left charleston around 6am, hoping to sleep on the way there, but sitting next to people on the plane who wanted to chat on both of my flights. however, the lady on the longer flight just so happened to start talking about faith, and her doubts, and her thoughts about the church, etc. etc. etc. Talk about the Lord handing me the easiest conversation ever to talk about my testimony, my experiences with God, and my love of Jesus. Her husband kept asking me if I wanted him to make her be quiet...haha. It was awesome...but...the bad part about plane rides is they are so short and you never see those people again. i am praying that the things we talked about and the reading i recommended will help her on her journey.
so i get to pittsburgh. at 10:30 on a sunday morning. practically everything in the whole city is closed, but i get on the hotel shuttle to go see the andy warhol museum. on the shuttle, i meet a guy and his kids who give me a free ticket to the Chicago Cubs/Pittsburgh Pirates game. I mean, really. Ridiculous.
So I go the museum....drool over the cambell's soup cans.....and meet them at their seats at the baseball game.....ON THE 5TH ROW....ON THE THIRD BASELINE. needless to say,i bought a baseball hat and some cracker jacks and called my dad to gloat over my amazingly strange luck that day.
okay okay. so the job. basically 40 new "rookies"from across the US trained the past two weeks (pittsburgh, then charlotte) learning everything about the Art Institutes nationwide. We memorized presentations, studied, and then had to get up and present...the 15 new culinary reps went into the kitchens with one of the top chefs in the country and he laughed at us while we learned to chop, mince, dice, and julienne. Somewhere between the dicing and the julienne I cut off half my fingernail and quickly got familiar with the first aid station in the kitchen. (i wasn't the only casualty, okay?).
The funny part was, all 40 of us had similar personalities. Meaning....the majority of us could have a conversation with a brick wall and like getting up in front of people. So when we were all together, it was a little.....loud.....to say the least. :)
i think one of the most enjoyable things so far is that i can be more of myself in this job. they want me to be funny....they want me to talk to people. crazy i know. i'm not afraid of taking a wrong step and getting fired for stapling something the wrong way, or not cleaning out the fridge, or something like that.
well....that and the fact that it gives me an excuse to watch the food network.
wow, i have not written on here in a long time.
i can't help it. my work computer won't let me blog b/c it has it blocked. and since this is the first week i have been home in forever, i haven't had a chance.
(haha...i talk like people other than my dad actually read this. i love you dad).
my first week of my new job was spent in pittsburgh. i left charleston around 6am, hoping to sleep on the way there, but sitting next to people on the plane who wanted to chat on both of my flights. however, the lady on the longer flight just so happened to start talking about faith, and her doubts, and her thoughts about the church, etc. etc. etc. Talk about the Lord handing me the easiest conversation ever to talk about my testimony, my experiences with God, and my love of Jesus. Her husband kept asking me if I wanted him to make her be quiet...haha. It was awesome...but...the bad part about plane rides is they are so short and you never see those people again. i am praying that the things we talked about and the reading i recommended will help her on her journey.
so i get to pittsburgh. at 10:30 on a sunday morning. practically everything in the whole city is closed, but i get on the hotel shuttle to go see the andy warhol museum. on the shuttle, i meet a guy and his kids who give me a free ticket to the Chicago Cubs/Pittsburgh Pirates game. I mean, really. Ridiculous.
So I go the museum....drool over the cambell's soup cans.....and meet them at their seats at the baseball game.....ON THE 5TH ROW....ON THE THIRD BASELINE. needless to say,i bought a baseball hat and some cracker jacks and called my dad to gloat over my amazingly strange luck that day.
okay okay. so the job. basically 40 new "rookies"from across the US trained the past two weeks (pittsburgh, then charlotte) learning everything about the Art Institutes nationwide. We memorized presentations, studied, and then had to get up and present...the 15 new culinary reps went into the kitchens with one of the top chefs in the country and he laughed at us while we learned to chop, mince, dice, and julienne. Somewhere between the dicing and the julienne I cut off half my fingernail and quickly got familiar with the first aid station in the kitchen. (i wasn't the only casualty, okay?).
The funny part was, all 40 of us had similar personalities. Meaning....the majority of us could have a conversation with a brick wall and like getting up in front of people. So when we were all together, it was a little.....loud.....to say the least. :)
i think one of the most enjoyable things so far is that i can be more of myself in this job. they want me to be funny....they want me to talk to people. crazy i know. i'm not afraid of taking a wrong step and getting fired for stapling something the wrong way, or not cleaning out the fridge, or something like that.
well....that and the fact that it gives me an excuse to watch the food network.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
wrong number
picking up a weird number:
me: hello! this is aly
redneck guy: HE - LLO!!!
me: hello?
redneck guy: who is this?
me: aly
redneck guy: who?
me: ALY
redneck guy: Aly!!!! What's going ooooon?!!!
me: what?
redneck guy: oh, i know i have the wrong number, but you just sounded purty.
me: ........thank you?
redneck guy: YOUR WELCOME!!!!!
me: well....have a good day!
redneck guy: YOU have a good day purty lady!
me: hello! this is aly
redneck guy: HE - LLO!!!
me: hello?
redneck guy: who is this?
me: aly
redneck guy: who?
me: ALY
redneck guy: Aly!!!! What's going ooooon?!!!
me: what?
redneck guy: oh, i know i have the wrong number, but you just sounded purty.
me: ........thank you?
redneck guy: YOUR WELCOME!!!!!
me: well....have a good day!
redneck guy: YOU have a good day purty lady!
Saturday, June 23, 2007
oh.....hi.......oh!
why are there so many people from ohio here? i don't know anyone from ohio or i would ask them.
has anybody else noticed this?
has anybody else noticed this?
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
happy birthday to me
23.
thats getting close to 25.
when you were little, 25 was old....25 was an adult.
am i really grown up now? most days i feel about... 12.
people i talk to on the phone at work tell me i sound like i'm 12 haha.
forget numbers, how i know i am offically an adult: i am at work on my birthday for the first time in my life. they are taking me out to lunch though, so that makes it a little better. :)
to my family and friends: thanks for all the messages- i love ya'll!
thats getting close to 25.
when you were little, 25 was old....25 was an adult.
am i really grown up now? most days i feel about... 12.
people i talk to on the phone at work tell me i sound like i'm 12 haha.
forget numbers, how i know i am offically an adult: i am at work on my birthday for the first time in my life. they are taking me out to lunch though, so that makes it a little better. :)
to my family and friends: thanks for all the messages- i love ya'll!
Monday, June 11, 2007
asking
so over the past few months a phrase that debi has drilled into our heads is,
"What comes to mind when you think about God is the most important thing about you."
...meaning that what you perceive God's character to be often reflects on the spiritual condition of your heart at that moment.
and for me, recently I have realized (or God has shown me) that I wasn't acting like i believed he is the giver of good things. i think it really boils down to the fact that i don't feel like i deserve them....well i know i don't. i think i forget to focus on grace.
I have gone through enough hard circumstances to know and believe that they can turn out to be blessings in the end.... though you first have to suffer through the trials. and although that does happen sometimes, that isn't the way it always has to be.
.....what about blessings that are just... blessings? asking God for something good and believing that if it is his will, he will give it to you? some days i have these big dreams....and i am afraid to ask for them because some small part of me is telling me "you are not made for big things! you can't even manage the small things in your life right now!" and that is a lie. God tells us to ask. He wants us to ask for impossible things, so that in our undeserving sinful weakness, he can give us a miracle and be glorified.
http://www.rbc.org/utmost/index.php?month=06&day=09&year=07
James 1:
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind."
i'm trying to believe. i'm daring to ask.
"What comes to mind when you think about God is the most important thing about you."
...meaning that what you perceive God's character to be often reflects on the spiritual condition of your heart at that moment.
and for me, recently I have realized (or God has shown me) that I wasn't acting like i believed he is the giver of good things. i think it really boils down to the fact that i don't feel like i deserve them....well i know i don't. i think i forget to focus on grace.
I have gone through enough hard circumstances to know and believe that they can turn out to be blessings in the end.... though you first have to suffer through the trials. and although that does happen sometimes, that isn't the way it always has to be.
.....what about blessings that are just... blessings? asking God for something good and believing that if it is his will, he will give it to you? some days i have these big dreams....and i am afraid to ask for them because some small part of me is telling me "you are not made for big things! you can't even manage the small things in your life right now!" and that is a lie. God tells us to ask. He wants us to ask for impossible things, so that in our undeserving sinful weakness, he can give us a miracle and be glorified.
http://www.rbc.org/utmost/index.php?month=06&day=09&year=07
James 1:
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind."
i'm trying to believe. i'm daring to ask.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
title? i don't know. i lose my creative edge after 2pm.
some things i am learning:
-sitting behond a desk for the majority of my day is slowly taking years off my life. i am working on remedying this. people every day are suffocating in the land of cubicles and multi-lined phones and carpel tunnel syndrome and i don't know how they do it for 30 years.
-most people (at least most people i know) are really not enjoying their first job out of college. this makes me feel good....well, better. not because my friends are suffering through horrible work experiences, but because i am not the only idiot that made a bad first career choice. there is strength in numbers guys. we'll learn from our mistakes.
-despite our craziness, my family is dysfunctionally functional. if that makes sense. the more and more I am exposed to really really bad family situations at work, the more I am thankful that my parents are relatively normal the majority of the time. i love them. :) they are really funny.
-how to catch bait. dad has officially declared me a "bubbette" (the female version of a bubba?). this honorable title was bestowed upon me after i successfully learned how to throw the cast net this weekend. after getting covered in pluff mud and a mouth of salt water, i did actually manage to catch some shrimp. yay.
-and....my brain often tries to convince me not to do what the Lord is telling me. Like when I am praying about a job with a Christian company and the Lord says clearly not to take it, my brain is saying "No!!! What are you doing!!! You need a job!!! These people are nice! This doesn't make any sense at all!" This is a problem. I am having to tell my brain to be quiet more and more frequently these days. Perhaps I am learning obedience even in seemingly illogical circumstances. I am banking on the fact that relying on earthly wisdom leads to disorder (see James 3).
*note: after writing this initially, i went home and read this below:
ha. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor? (and an ironic one at that).
"Yes— But . . .!"
Lord, I will follow You, but . . . —Luke 9:61
Suppose God tells you to do something that is an enormous test of your common sense, totally going against it. What will you do? Will you hold back? If you get into the habit of doing something physically, you will do it every time you are tested until you break the habit through sheer determination. And the same is true spiritually. Again and again you will come right up to what Jesus wants, but every time you will turn back at the true point of testing, until you are determined to abandon yourself to God in total surrender. Yet we tend to say, "Yes, but— suppose I do obey God in this matter, what about . . . ?" Or we say, "Yes, I will obey God if what He asks of me doesn’t go against my common sense, but don’t ask me to take a step in the dark."
Jesus Christ demands the same unrestrained, adventurous spirit in those who have placed their trust in Him that the natural man exhibits. If a person is ever going to do anything worthwhile, there will be times when he must risk everything by his leap in the dark. In the spiritual realm, Jesus Christ demands that you risk everything you hold on to or believe through common sense, and leap by faith into what He says. Once you obey, you will immediately find that what He says is as solidly consistent as common sense.
By the test of common sense, Jesus Christ’s statements may seem mad, but when you test them by the trial of faith, your findings will fill your spirit with the awesome fact that they are the very words of God. Trust completely in God, and when He brings you to a new opportunity of adventure, offering it to you, see that you take it. We act like pagans in a crisis— only one out of an entire crowd is daring enough to invest his faith in the character of God.
-sitting behond a desk for the majority of my day is slowly taking years off my life. i am working on remedying this. people every day are suffocating in the land of cubicles and multi-lined phones and carpel tunnel syndrome and i don't know how they do it for 30 years.
-most people (at least most people i know) are really not enjoying their first job out of college. this makes me feel good....well, better. not because my friends are suffering through horrible work experiences, but because i am not the only idiot that made a bad first career choice. there is strength in numbers guys. we'll learn from our mistakes.
-despite our craziness, my family is dysfunctionally functional. if that makes sense. the more and more I am exposed to really really bad family situations at work, the more I am thankful that my parents are relatively normal the majority of the time. i love them. :) they are really funny.
-how to catch bait. dad has officially declared me a "bubbette" (the female version of a bubba?). this honorable title was bestowed upon me after i successfully learned how to throw the cast net this weekend. after getting covered in pluff mud and a mouth of salt water, i did actually manage to catch some shrimp. yay.
-and....my brain often tries to convince me not to do what the Lord is telling me. Like when I am praying about a job with a Christian company and the Lord says clearly not to take it, my brain is saying "No!!! What are you doing!!! You need a job!!! These people are nice! This doesn't make any sense at all!" This is a problem. I am having to tell my brain to be quiet more and more frequently these days. Perhaps I am learning obedience even in seemingly illogical circumstances. I am banking on the fact that relying on earthly wisdom leads to disorder (see James 3).
*note: after writing this initially, i went home and read this below:
ha. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor? (and an ironic one at that).
"Yes— But . . .!"
Lord, I will follow You, but . . . —Luke 9:61
Suppose God tells you to do something that is an enormous test of your common sense, totally going against it. What will you do? Will you hold back? If you get into the habit of doing something physically, you will do it every time you are tested until you break the habit through sheer determination. And the same is true spiritually. Again and again you will come right up to what Jesus wants, but every time you will turn back at the true point of testing, until you are determined to abandon yourself to God in total surrender. Yet we tend to say, "Yes, but— suppose I do obey God in this matter, what about . . . ?" Or we say, "Yes, I will obey God if what He asks of me doesn’t go against my common sense, but don’t ask me to take a step in the dark."
Jesus Christ demands the same unrestrained, adventurous spirit in those who have placed their trust in Him that the natural man exhibits. If a person is ever going to do anything worthwhile, there will be times when he must risk everything by his leap in the dark. In the spiritual realm, Jesus Christ demands that you risk everything you hold on to or believe through common sense, and leap by faith into what He says. Once you obey, you will immediately find that what He says is as solidly consistent as common sense.
By the test of common sense, Jesus Christ’s statements may seem mad, but when you test them by the trial of faith, your findings will fill your spirit with the awesome fact that they are the very words of God. Trust completely in God, and when He brings you to a new opportunity of adventure, offering it to you, see that you take it. We act like pagans in a crisis— only one out of an entire crowd is daring enough to invest his faith in the character of God.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
trusting in his promises
listening to selah:
you are my hiding place
you always fill my heart
with songs of deliverance
whenever i am afraid
i will trust in you
i will trust in you
let the weak say i am strong
in the strength of the Lord
i will trust in you
then happened to go home and read Psalm 32 on the same day. weird.
well, not weird. God.
1 Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
2 Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit.
3 When I kept silent, my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
4 For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer.
5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD "
— and you forgave the guilt of my sin.
6 Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found
surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.
7 You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.
8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you and watch over you.
9 Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.
10 Many are the woes of the wicked, but the LORD's unfailing love
surrounds the man who trusts in him.
11 Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous;
sing, all you who are upright in heart!
If he says he will, then he will. A promise is a promise, after all.
you are my hiding place
you always fill my heart
with songs of deliverance
whenever i am afraid
i will trust in you
i will trust in you
let the weak say i am strong
in the strength of the Lord
i will trust in you
then happened to go home and read Psalm 32 on the same day. weird.
well, not weird. God.
1 Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
2 Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit.
3 When I kept silent, my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
4 For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer.
5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD "
— and you forgave the guilt of my sin.
6 Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found
surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.
7 You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.
8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you and watch over you.
9 Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding
but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.
10 Many are the woes of the wicked, but the LORD's unfailing love
surrounds the man who trusts in him.
11 Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous;
sing, all you who are upright in heart!
If he says he will, then he will. A promise is a promise, after all.
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
the outcastes
so a week or two ago a missionary came and spoke to our sunday school at church. he lives overseas a good bit of the time. and he was talking about the caste system that is in place where he is...
the majority of the population is in the lowest caste and many are even completely outside of the caste system all together...the outcastes. these people are pariahs of "civilized" society... considered to be nothing but"talking animals" by the upper castes.
their voices cannot be heard by people in the upper castes b/c it would "pollute" them...they cannot touch something at the same time as someone in the upper caste b/c it would be considered the same as physically touching them...something the upper castes consider disgusting. some of the outcastes are termed "unsee-ables" because they cannot even be seen by anyone in the upper castes. they travel the streets only at night under the cover of darkness to do things like sweeping the streets and removing garbage.
so.....these things have really stuck with me. it makes me physically sick to think about this kind of injustice. partly because its sad that only a few dedicated people are even attempting to do anything about this problem.
and partly because of a dream i've had.
i rarely rememember my dreams, usually just my nightmares (too bad its not the other way around). i'm not sure if this would qualify as a nightmare or not, but it certainly is disturbing to me. since i've had it about 4 or 5 separate times now, i figured it might be something i should think about.
anyway, in the dream i am driving on this particular road in charleston and i see this homeless guy standing by the side of the road. and he's looking at me...right at me in the eyes. and he's crying.
that's it. then i wake up.
and i've been looking for him ever since.
i've been thinking about our 'unsee-ables' in charleston. the people we try not to look at...or don't look at. we pretend we don't see the homeless people standing on the corners with signs, or in the market in wheelchairs asking for change.
but its not just them.
how often do we look at the clerk in the grocery store line? i mean, really look at them in the face and speak words to them other than the automatic response of "i'm doing good thanks"? do we treat them any differently than the automated machine in the u-scan line?
what about the people stranded on the side of the road by their broken down cars looking hot and tired?and do we treat the people at the drive through window with frustration as we snatch our food from them because we had to wait in line for 5 minutes?
i guess i've been thinking about how much we don't treat people like...people. really we are no better than those living by their castes. we treat people like talking animals sometimes too. and that needs to change. really we need to see people as Jesus saw them....as precious treasures...lost and in need of God's love.
Psalm 72:1-14
"Give the king your justice, O God,and your righteousness to the royal son!
May he judge your people with righteousness,and your poor with justice!
Let the mountains bear prosperity for the people,and the hills, in righteousness!
May he defend the cause of the poor of the people,give deliverance to the children of the needy,and crush the oppressor!...
For he delivers the needy when he calls,the poor and him who has no helper.
He has pity on the weak and the needy,and saves the lives of the needy.
From oppression and violence he redeems their life,and precious is their blood in his sight."
the majority of the population is in the lowest caste and many are even completely outside of the caste system all together...the outcastes. these people are pariahs of "civilized" society... considered to be nothing but"talking animals" by the upper castes.
their voices cannot be heard by people in the upper castes b/c it would "pollute" them...they cannot touch something at the same time as someone in the upper caste b/c it would be considered the same as physically touching them...something the upper castes consider disgusting. some of the outcastes are termed "unsee-ables" because they cannot even be seen by anyone in the upper castes. they travel the streets only at night under the cover of darkness to do things like sweeping the streets and removing garbage.
so.....these things have really stuck with me. it makes me physically sick to think about this kind of injustice. partly because its sad that only a few dedicated people are even attempting to do anything about this problem.
and partly because of a dream i've had.
i rarely rememember my dreams, usually just my nightmares (too bad its not the other way around). i'm not sure if this would qualify as a nightmare or not, but it certainly is disturbing to me. since i've had it about 4 or 5 separate times now, i figured it might be something i should think about.
anyway, in the dream i am driving on this particular road in charleston and i see this homeless guy standing by the side of the road. and he's looking at me...right at me in the eyes. and he's crying.
that's it. then i wake up.
and i've been looking for him ever since.
i've been thinking about our 'unsee-ables' in charleston. the people we try not to look at...or don't look at. we pretend we don't see the homeless people standing on the corners with signs, or in the market in wheelchairs asking for change.
but its not just them.
how often do we look at the clerk in the grocery store line? i mean, really look at them in the face and speak words to them other than the automatic response of "i'm doing good thanks"? do we treat them any differently than the automated machine in the u-scan line?
what about the people stranded on the side of the road by their broken down cars looking hot and tired?and do we treat the people at the drive through window with frustration as we snatch our food from them because we had to wait in line for 5 minutes?
i guess i've been thinking about how much we don't treat people like...people. really we are no better than those living by their castes. we treat people like talking animals sometimes too. and that needs to change. really we need to see people as Jesus saw them....as precious treasures...lost and in need of God's love.
Psalm 72:1-14
"Give the king your justice, O God,and your righteousness to the royal son!
May he judge your people with righteousness,and your poor with justice!
Let the mountains bear prosperity for the people,and the hills, in righteousness!
May he defend the cause of the poor of the people,give deliverance to the children of the needy,and crush the oppressor!...
For he delivers the needy when he calls,the poor and him who has no helper.
He has pity on the weak and the needy,and saves the lives of the needy.
From oppression and violence he redeems their life,and precious is their blood in his sight."
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
thank goodness someone else can verbalize it
Article from Relevant:
"Lately, life has been overwhelming and incomprehensible, and it scares me. I’m afraid to even have a plan or a dream because I’m afraid of being wrong. I’ve been wrong so much lately it seems. I don’t know as much about what I want as I think.
My compassion occasionally grants people the right to walk all over me. My ambition sometimes chokes my relationships, because I forget to slow down and really see people. My goal of excellence pushes me too far, and before I know it I’m expecting perfection from others and myself. My optimism causes me to be hurt by life’s disappointments and failures. My feisty character sometimes causes me to say or do things I regret later. My thirst for knowledge often turns to arrogance. My desire to be known sometimes causes me to act self-important. My self-consciousness prompts me to hide. My independent spirit sometimes alienates people when I actually really need them.
It seems like lately I’ve been erring on the wrong side of my personality, like life is all leaning in one direction, like gravity is pulling me downward when I’d really like to learn how to fly. I’m discovering more and more flaws, more and more things I need to work through.
And I cry out to God to heal me, to give me wisdom in the complexities of life, to grant me the courage and humility to apologize, to allow me to see myself truthfully. Yet, I’m still wrong sometimes. I hurt other people. I hurt myself. I hurt God.
It’s never made sense to me that God would guide me to be wrong. So, I’m surprised at how often I muddle up the things I feel very strongly that God has led me to do. But, at the same time, I don’t regret any fumbled steps. I know God was there with me for each stagger. Maybe it’s possible for God to guide us to do things even though He knows we’re going to flounder and blunder our way through it. Maybe that’s what God’s grace looks like—it fills the gap between our bumpy, messy lives and His glory.
My faults, my failures, my fumbles and my messes … That is where the glory of God comes in and illuminates, not for the sake of my knowing or understanding life, but for my seeing the greatness of God.
Maybe my mistake is in thinking I have to look like porcelain in order for God’s glory to be evident. Maybe I actually have to allow myself to be seen as the mess I really am. Because in my weaknesses, in the cracks in the porcelain, others may see the power and goodness of God."
--Rebecca Mayer
"Lately, life has been overwhelming and incomprehensible, and it scares me. I’m afraid to even have a plan or a dream because I’m afraid of being wrong. I’ve been wrong so much lately it seems. I don’t know as much about what I want as I think.
My compassion occasionally grants people the right to walk all over me. My ambition sometimes chokes my relationships, because I forget to slow down and really see people. My goal of excellence pushes me too far, and before I know it I’m expecting perfection from others and myself. My optimism causes me to be hurt by life’s disappointments and failures. My feisty character sometimes causes me to say or do things I regret later. My thirst for knowledge often turns to arrogance. My desire to be known sometimes causes me to act self-important. My self-consciousness prompts me to hide. My independent spirit sometimes alienates people when I actually really need them.
It seems like lately I’ve been erring on the wrong side of my personality, like life is all leaning in one direction, like gravity is pulling me downward when I’d really like to learn how to fly. I’m discovering more and more flaws, more and more things I need to work through.
And I cry out to God to heal me, to give me wisdom in the complexities of life, to grant me the courage and humility to apologize, to allow me to see myself truthfully. Yet, I’m still wrong sometimes. I hurt other people. I hurt myself. I hurt God.
It’s never made sense to me that God would guide me to be wrong. So, I’m surprised at how often I muddle up the things I feel very strongly that God has led me to do. But, at the same time, I don’t regret any fumbled steps. I know God was there with me for each stagger. Maybe it’s possible for God to guide us to do things even though He knows we’re going to flounder and blunder our way through it. Maybe that’s what God’s grace looks like—it fills the gap between our bumpy, messy lives and His glory.
My faults, my failures, my fumbles and my messes … That is where the glory of God comes in and illuminates, not for the sake of my knowing or understanding life, but for my seeing the greatness of God.
Maybe my mistake is in thinking I have to look like porcelain in order for God’s glory to be evident. Maybe I actually have to allow myself to be seen as the mess I really am. Because in my weaknesses, in the cracks in the porcelain, others may see the power and goodness of God."
--Rebecca Mayer
Friday, April 20, 2007
must...stay...awake
so i'm killing time till i have to go back to relay for life at midnight for my graveyard shift for a few more hours.
here is a picture from me and barbara after our survivor lap....my first year as a survivor!
here is a picture from me and barbara after our survivor lap....my first year as a survivor!
quote of the night: (as the survivors are standing in line to get our free banquet of food)
"well, we lose our hair...pay thousands of dollars in medical bills...but at least they repay us with a sash and a ton of really good free food! Haha......they probably think we are all still on steroids and have the munchies..."
other good ones from this weird week:
"This is my new cat. His name is Squish and he has one eye." (Older lady I went to visit).
"I know they say you are supposed to respect your elders, but it is getting harder and harder to find any!" (Old man at a health fair)
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
easter
was good this year.
partly because we made it through the weekend without any hospital visits.
partly because i purposefully guarded enough time to really try and reflect throughout the weekend about the incredible-ness that is the cross.
good friday served sufficiently to kick me in my face with the overwhelming amount of ugliness that comes way too naturally to me. JI Packer writes that,
"Still he shows his freedom and lordship by discriminating between sinners, causing some to hear the gospel while others do not hear it, and moving some of those who hear it to repentance while leaving others in their unbelief, thus teaching his saints that he owes mercy to none and that it is entirely of his grace, not at all through their own self effort, that they themselves have found life."
it surely is only by his grace that he has chosen me for some odd reason. but i am extremely thankful that he did.
the weekend was spent with my whole crazy southern family down at edisto...pretty much doing nothing but eating because it was too cold to go fishing. :) it also included some much needed time with mom and dad assuring me that no, i'm not crazy... that its okay that i don't have my whole career planned out yet...that 22 years old is much too young to "fail at life" (okay so i was being dramatic)...and that no, they don't mind that i still need taking care of and they actually enjoy helping me stumble forward into my future... because thats what parents do when they love their children.
oh. and i got to play with my dog.
but perhaps the highlight of the weekend was when in the middle of the church service on sunday morning (in a pretty conservative baptist church on the island), a little boy with down's syndrome stood up with his arms raised and yelled "YAY FOR EASTER!!!!!" and the whole church broke into loud applause and "amens". it sort of felt like a movie or something because the moment was almost too perfect to be real. really, we should all be that excited that jesus has risen that we want to yell about it...even after easter is over.
so...YAY FOR EASTER
partly because we made it through the weekend without any hospital visits.
partly because i purposefully guarded enough time to really try and reflect throughout the weekend about the incredible-ness that is the cross.
good friday served sufficiently to kick me in my face with the overwhelming amount of ugliness that comes way too naturally to me. JI Packer writes that,
"Still he shows his freedom and lordship by discriminating between sinners, causing some to hear the gospel while others do not hear it, and moving some of those who hear it to repentance while leaving others in their unbelief, thus teaching his saints that he owes mercy to none and that it is entirely of his grace, not at all through their own self effort, that they themselves have found life."
it surely is only by his grace that he has chosen me for some odd reason. but i am extremely thankful that he did.
the weekend was spent with my whole crazy southern family down at edisto...pretty much doing nothing but eating because it was too cold to go fishing. :) it also included some much needed time with mom and dad assuring me that no, i'm not crazy... that its okay that i don't have my whole career planned out yet...that 22 years old is much too young to "fail at life" (okay so i was being dramatic)...and that no, they don't mind that i still need taking care of and they actually enjoy helping me stumble forward into my future... because thats what parents do when they love their children.
oh. and i got to play with my dog.
but perhaps the highlight of the weekend was when in the middle of the church service on sunday morning (in a pretty conservative baptist church on the island), a little boy with down's syndrome stood up with his arms raised and yelled "YAY FOR EASTER!!!!!" and the whole church broke into loud applause and "amens". it sort of felt like a movie or something because the moment was almost too perfect to be real. really, we should all be that excited that jesus has risen that we want to yell about it...even after easter is over.
so...YAY FOR EASTER
Thursday, April 05, 2007
on my desk calendar yesterday,
the quote for the day was "The love of a genuine, patient and true friend gives us one small glimpse of what it will be like to be with God for all eternity"
and strangely enough, God sent a dear friend out of the blue to refresh me yesterday in the middle of the week. she doesn't live here and i miss her. our friendship is....comfortable. honest. it feels sort of like coming back home. we have seen each other at our worst (when we are complaining or irritable... or worse) and we still love each other. she encourages me to be a better person...a more godly person.
and we had dinner and fell asleep talking about how weird it is that we are supposedly adults now.
it was wonderful. and i needed it to get through the week.
thanks for the visit...i love you! :)
and strangely enough, God sent a dear friend out of the blue to refresh me yesterday in the middle of the week. she doesn't live here and i miss her. our friendship is....comfortable. honest. it feels sort of like coming back home. we have seen each other at our worst (when we are complaining or irritable... or worse) and we still love each other. she encourages me to be a better person...a more godly person.
and we had dinner and fell asleep talking about how weird it is that we are supposedly adults now.
it was wonderful. and i needed it to get through the week.
thanks for the visit...i love you! :)
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Monday, April 02, 2007
Bridge Run 2006 vs. Bridge Run 2007
so.....we are all still recovering from the bridge run on saturday. or at least i am. my body is apparently fairly angry at me for forcing it to run 6.2 miles. :)
but, i did manage to cut a few minutes off my time from last year so i was happy.
the only thing i could think of while i was running was where i was a year ago.
the day before the bridge run last year, i had my biopsy done on my thryoid. the doctor had told me that i could still run (as long as i "didn't try to beat the kenyans or anything"...ha). so i ran my very first bridge run last year...with a bandaid on my throbbing neck and wondering if i had cancer or not. two days later on april 3rd, i got a phone call telling me that yes, in fact, i did.
the weeks that followed leading into easter 2006 seem like a blur. i don't think we even celebrated easter at all actually....cancer surgeries, a death, and a heart attack hailstormed down on our family within the same week...so much so that we stayed on a constant sense of alert waiting for the next bad thing to happen throughout the rest of the year.
during this years bridge run i couldn't help but thank the Lord for bringing me and my family through all of that mess somehow. 2007 has been a lot better....not easy, but better.
i am cancer free.
it doesn't get old no matter how many times i say that. :)
The Lord does not promise that we never will go through rough times but he is faithful to bring us out of them.
"But now thus says the LORD,he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel:"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I give Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in exchange for you. Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you..." Isaiah 43: 1-4
but, i did manage to cut a few minutes off my time from last year so i was happy.
the only thing i could think of while i was running was where i was a year ago.
the day before the bridge run last year, i had my biopsy done on my thryoid. the doctor had told me that i could still run (as long as i "didn't try to beat the kenyans or anything"...ha). so i ran my very first bridge run last year...with a bandaid on my throbbing neck and wondering if i had cancer or not. two days later on april 3rd, i got a phone call telling me that yes, in fact, i did.
the weeks that followed leading into easter 2006 seem like a blur. i don't think we even celebrated easter at all actually....cancer surgeries, a death, and a heart attack hailstormed down on our family within the same week...so much so that we stayed on a constant sense of alert waiting for the next bad thing to happen throughout the rest of the year.
during this years bridge run i couldn't help but thank the Lord for bringing me and my family through all of that mess somehow. 2007 has been a lot better....not easy, but better.
i am cancer free.
it doesn't get old no matter how many times i say that. :)
The Lord does not promise that we never will go through rough times but he is faithful to bring us out of them.
"But now thus says the LORD,he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel:"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I give Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in exchange for you. Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you..." Isaiah 43: 1-4
Friday, March 30, 2007
cool poem
Written by Nate Millheim from ReIMAGINE:
"This bit of spoken word poetry was written as I walked through the diverse and beautiful Mission District of San Francisco, asking God to help me simply love …
My Thoughts
Sometimes they get all messed up,
they get all jacked up, all tripped up.
I see the tough guy with the tank-top under the double-x T-shirt,
gold chains hanging down
and a scowl on the brow,
and I feel threatened,
I feel offended, I feel defensive.
I see the hipster with the precocious smirk,
listening to some band he’s proud to know because other people don’t.
The T-shirt with the cute little graphic
New Balance shoes, Cool tattoos, the funky hat,
the ritual coffee cup and the road bike that makes him peg his right pant leg on his oh so tight jeans.
My thoughts get all messed up in my head,
I’d like to love but I’d rather not.
My own insecurities and my own peculiarities are calling.
The little boys hop the fence into the half finished Garfield Square.
Pipes and rocks are used instead of the baseball bats and balls that never came on Christmas morning.
Rocks are whizzing past my baby girl’s head.
Anger rises in my veins like a wave at Mavericks.
What feelings am I feeling now? What thoughts race through my tired brain?
When the man at the park scolds me, shaking his head, for not bringing him a bicycle .
While my family sits the drunken man knocks on the window of my car and complains that we will not give him food. He shakes his head in anger and disgust, scaring my two lovely ladies.
What now? Thoughts, feelings, thoughts, feelings, thoughts, feelings ...
I need to breathe.
I need to stop.
I need to rest.
My God says He loves, He cares, He sympathizes, He wishes well
He created ... In HIS IMAGE
He grieves when He sees the heroine needles.
He cries when He sees the lonely child.
Jesus spoke of a life abundant,
A life He came for us to have.
Echoes from my Sunday school childhood ring in my ear ...
Change my heart oh God, Make it ever true
Change my heart oh God, May I be like you
Let me be so in tune, like a head bopping to a Jay Z tune
My thoughts full of your thoughts
May my brain be full of good thoughts, full of generosity
May my heart be filled with a compassion it has never known
May my feelings find direction and inspiration from my Creator
Let me think YOUR thoughts and feel YOUR feelings for the people I see."
"This bit of spoken word poetry was written as I walked through the diverse and beautiful Mission District of San Francisco, asking God to help me simply love …
My Thoughts
Sometimes they get all messed up,
they get all jacked up, all tripped up.
I see the tough guy with the tank-top under the double-x T-shirt,
gold chains hanging down
and a scowl on the brow,
and I feel threatened,
I feel offended, I feel defensive.
I see the hipster with the precocious smirk,
listening to some band he’s proud to know because other people don’t.
The T-shirt with the cute little graphic
New Balance shoes, Cool tattoos, the funky hat,
the ritual coffee cup and the road bike that makes him peg his right pant leg on his oh so tight jeans.
My thoughts get all messed up in my head,
I’d like to love but I’d rather not.
My own insecurities and my own peculiarities are calling.
The little boys hop the fence into the half finished Garfield Square.
Pipes and rocks are used instead of the baseball bats and balls that never came on Christmas morning.
Rocks are whizzing past my baby girl’s head.
Anger rises in my veins like a wave at Mavericks.
What feelings am I feeling now? What thoughts race through my tired brain?
When the man at the park scolds me, shaking his head, for not bringing him a bicycle .
While my family sits the drunken man knocks on the window of my car and complains that we will not give him food. He shakes his head in anger and disgust, scaring my two lovely ladies.
What now? Thoughts, feelings, thoughts, feelings, thoughts, feelings ...
I need to breathe.
I need to stop.
I need to rest.
My God says He loves, He cares, He sympathizes, He wishes well
He created ... In HIS IMAGE
He grieves when He sees the heroine needles.
He cries when He sees the lonely child.
Jesus spoke of a life abundant,
A life He came for us to have.
Echoes from my Sunday school childhood ring in my ear ...
Change my heart oh God, Make it ever true
Change my heart oh God, May I be like you
Let me be so in tune, like a head bopping to a Jay Z tune
My thoughts full of your thoughts
May my brain be full of good thoughts, full of generosity
May my heart be filled with a compassion it has never known
May my feelings find direction and inspiration from my Creator
Let me think YOUR thoughts and feel YOUR feelings for the people I see."
Thursday, March 29, 2007
when its been a rough week....or weeks
Psalm 40
I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods*. (the ESV calls them "lies")
Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.
Sacrifice and offering you did not desire,
but my ears you have opened;
burnt offerings and sin offerings
you did not require.
Then I said, "Here I am, I have come—
it is written about me in the scroll.
I desire to do your will, O my God;
your law is within my heart."
I proclaim righteousness in the great assembly;
I do not seal my lips,
as you know, O LORD.
I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
I speak of your faithfulness and salvation.
I do not conceal your love and your truth
from the great assembly.
Do not withhold your mercy from me, O LORD;
may your love and your truth always protect me.
For troubles without number surround me;
my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
and my heart fails within me.
Be pleased, O LORD, to save me;
O LORD, come quickly to help me.
May all who seek to take my life
be put to shame and confusion;
may all who desire my ruin
be turned back in disgrace.
May those who say to me, "Aha! Aha!"
be appalled at their own shame.
But may all who seek you
rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who love your salvation always say,
"The LORD be exalted!"
Yet I am poor and needy;
may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
O my God, do not delay.
When my mouth fails to produce the words needed to cry out to the Lord, his Spirit is so faithful to intercede and lead me right to what I desperately need.
May the Lord give you strength to make it through your days with joy.
I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods*. (the ESV calls them "lies")
Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.
Sacrifice and offering you did not desire,
but my ears you have opened;
burnt offerings and sin offerings
you did not require.
Then I said, "Here I am, I have come—
it is written about me in the scroll.
I desire to do your will, O my God;
your law is within my heart."
I proclaim righteousness in the great assembly;
I do not seal my lips,
as you know, O LORD.
I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
I speak of your faithfulness and salvation.
I do not conceal your love and your truth
from the great assembly.
Do not withhold your mercy from me, O LORD;
may your love and your truth always protect me.
For troubles without number surround me;
my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
and my heart fails within me.
Be pleased, O LORD, to save me;
O LORD, come quickly to help me.
May all who seek to take my life
be put to shame and confusion;
may all who desire my ruin
be turned back in disgrace.
May those who say to me, "Aha! Aha!"
be appalled at their own shame.
But may all who seek you
rejoice and be glad in you;
may those who love your salvation always say,
"The LORD be exalted!"
Yet I am poor and needy;
may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
O my God, do not delay.
When my mouth fails to produce the words needed to cry out to the Lord, his Spirit is so faithful to intercede and lead me right to what I desperately need.
May the Lord give you strength to make it through your days with joy.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
beautiful day
so to preface this, i need to say things have been a little crazy lately and i realized i have been struggling a bit with contentment in my present circumstances for various reasons. (thank you ryan for convicting all of us at exchange this week...ouch) how often we doubt that the Lord has good intent for us, even when he has shown us (me) extreme faithfulness. i am so much like Israel sometimes it makes me cringe.
but i have been feeling restless lately...like i want to pick up and go somewhere different. and the Lord has shown me that partly this is due to a little discontentment. so we are working on that. :)
anyways...in light of all this i went running today with paige. i thoroughly enjoy our runs. sometimes when we are running we dance (yes, even on market street)...b/c really we just don't care and it makes it less boring...and its even funnier if there are actually large groups people around watching us wave our hands in the air while sucking wind down the battery.
so today we were having one of the above mentioned runs...and i was listening to some U2. and i looked up and just all of a sudden was overwhelmed with how beautiful everything is...how blue the sky was ...and what a gorgeous city i live in... and how thankful i am to have friends like paige who have such a similar spirit as i do...and that i am ...alive...to enjoy all of these beautiful things.
and I said a little prayer of thanks to the God who has blessed me so much.
but i have been feeling restless lately...like i want to pick up and go somewhere different. and the Lord has shown me that partly this is due to a little discontentment. so we are working on that. :)
anyways...in light of all this i went running today with paige. i thoroughly enjoy our runs. sometimes when we are running we dance (yes, even on market street)...b/c really we just don't care and it makes it less boring...and its even funnier if there are actually large groups people around watching us wave our hands in the air while sucking wind down the battery.
so today we were having one of the above mentioned runs...and i was listening to some U2. and i looked up and just all of a sudden was overwhelmed with how beautiful everything is...how blue the sky was ...and what a gorgeous city i live in... and how thankful i am to have friends like paige who have such a similar spirit as i do...and that i am ...alive...to enjoy all of these beautiful things.
and I said a little prayer of thanks to the God who has blessed me so much.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
i'm telling you, this girl is a genius.
I am afraid of beginning
‘cause I don’t know how to end
But you told me:
that the mountain before us
would become a plain in our eyes
So I won’t despise,
I won’t despise the day
I won’t despise the day of small things.
Even when you tell me…
oh, even then I’m shaking
‘Cause I am afraid of believing
The plans that we make seem so big
But you’ve shown me
that we’re never alone
and your spirit will stay by our side
So I won’t despise
I won’t despise the day
I won’t despise the day of small things.
-alli rogers
when we are afraid of doing what the Lord tells us to do because we don't know how it will turn out, we need to (i need to) have faith that He can do much more than we imagine, and take comfort in knowing he will never leave us.
Sometimes I think I am afraid to believe the Lord...even when he gives me the blessing of clear instruction...because usually His plans are so much bigger than what I would choose. Yes, his plans are bigger...but so is His power.
Lord, I believe. Help me overcome my unbelief.
Mark 9:14-27
‘cause I don’t know how to end
But you told me:
that the mountain before us
would become a plain in our eyes
So I won’t despise,
I won’t despise the day
I won’t despise the day of small things.
Even when you tell me…
oh, even then I’m shaking
‘Cause I am afraid of believing
The plans that we make seem so big
But you’ve shown me
that we’re never alone
and your spirit will stay by our side
So I won’t despise
I won’t despise the day
I won’t despise the day of small things.
-alli rogers
when we are afraid of doing what the Lord tells us to do because we don't know how it will turn out, we need to (i need to) have faith that He can do much more than we imagine, and take comfort in knowing he will never leave us.
Sometimes I think I am afraid to believe the Lord...even when he gives me the blessing of clear instruction...because usually His plans are so much bigger than what I would choose. Yes, his plans are bigger...but so is His power.
Lord, I believe. Help me overcome my unbelief.
Mark 9:14-27
Thursday, March 08, 2007
i have good genes
"Be patient, be wise, be still, be consistent."
-my dad
good advice considering none of the above come naturally to me. :)
-my dad
good advice considering none of the above come naturally to me. :)
Sunday, March 04, 2007
i knew physics would come in handy one day....
first:
just need to say thank you to all the awesome people who have prayed for me during these past 1 1/2 years. ya'll are amazingly encouraging and throw incredible post cancer parties. ;)
somehow thank you doesn't quite seem enough.
the words are inadequate to really express my gratitude.
when i find a better way to say it, i will.
second: (for all of you scientists)
i read this a while ago and this is the first chance i have gotten to write it all down. Next time somebody uses the metaphor of light and darkness (with light = good and darkness = bad), think about this:
"In the Hebrew tradition...light is a metaphor. God makes a cosmos out of the nothingness, a molecular composition, of which He is not and never has been, as any thing is limiting, and God has no limits...And into this being, into this existence, God first creates light. This light is not to be confused with the sun and moon and stars, as they are not created until later. He simply creates light, a nonsubstance that is like a particle and like a wave, but perhaps neither, just some kind of travelling energy...Light, then, becomes a fitting metaphor for a nonbeing who is. God, if like light, travels at the speed of light, and because space and time are mingled with speed, the speed of light is the magic, exact number that allows a kind of escape from time....The faster you move, physicists have found, the less you experience time. And if you move at the speed of light, you will never age; you are outside of time; you are an eternal creature. But...you and I, made from molecules, cannot travel at the speed of light and cannot escape time, at least not with a body. Consider the complexity of light in light of the Hebrew metaphor: we don't see light; we see what it touches. It is more or less invisible, made from nothing, just purposed and focused energy, infinite in its power (it will never tire if fitted into a vacuum, going on forever). How fitting then, for God to create an existence, then a metaphor, as if to say, here is something entirely unlike you, outside of time, infinite in its power and thrust: here is something you can experience but cannot understand. Throughout the remainder of the Bible, then, God calls himself light. "
Donald Miller, Through Painted Deserts
the Lord knew that perhaps the true, deeper meaning of calling himself light (and how the scientific properties of light reflect his glory) would not be discovered until thousands of years after he originally spoke it to the Hebrew people.
thank you physicists for figuring stuff like this out. and thank you donald miller for writing about it in such a way that us non-scientific people could begin to understand it.
just need to say thank you to all the awesome people who have prayed for me during these past 1 1/2 years. ya'll are amazingly encouraging and throw incredible post cancer parties. ;)
somehow thank you doesn't quite seem enough.
the words are inadequate to really express my gratitude.
when i find a better way to say it, i will.
second: (for all of you scientists)
i read this a while ago and this is the first chance i have gotten to write it all down. Next time somebody uses the metaphor of light and darkness (with light = good and darkness = bad), think about this:
"In the Hebrew tradition...light is a metaphor. God makes a cosmos out of the nothingness, a molecular composition, of which He is not and never has been, as any thing is limiting, and God has no limits...And into this being, into this existence, God first creates light. This light is not to be confused with the sun and moon and stars, as they are not created until later. He simply creates light, a nonsubstance that is like a particle and like a wave, but perhaps neither, just some kind of travelling energy...Light, then, becomes a fitting metaphor for a nonbeing who is. God, if like light, travels at the speed of light, and because space and time are mingled with speed, the speed of light is the magic, exact number that allows a kind of escape from time....The faster you move, physicists have found, the less you experience time. And if you move at the speed of light, you will never age; you are outside of time; you are an eternal creature. But...you and I, made from molecules, cannot travel at the speed of light and cannot escape time, at least not with a body. Consider the complexity of light in light of the Hebrew metaphor: we don't see light; we see what it touches. It is more or less invisible, made from nothing, just purposed and focused energy, infinite in its power (it will never tire if fitted into a vacuum, going on forever). How fitting then, for God to create an existence, then a metaphor, as if to say, here is something entirely unlike you, outside of time, infinite in its power and thrust: here is something you can experience but cannot understand. Throughout the remainder of the Bible, then, God calls himself light. "
Donald Miller, Through Painted Deserts
the Lord knew that perhaps the true, deeper meaning of calling himself light (and how the scientific properties of light reflect his glory) would not be discovered until thousands of years after he originally spoke it to the Hebrew people.
thank you physicists for figuring stuff like this out. and thank you donald miller for writing about it in such a way that us non-scientific people could begin to understand it.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
how sweet the sound
if william wilberforce were not already married....
and dead.....
i might would marry him myself.
good movie. go see it if you haven't already:
http://www.amazinggracemovie.com/
and dead.....
i might would marry him myself.
good movie. go see it if you haven't already:
http://www.amazinggracemovie.com/
Monday, February 26, 2007
a lesson on how to not waste your life
so yesterday in sunday school we had the privilege of listening to a married couple who have been doing missions in the Northern Africa area for about 40 years or so...and they were amazing.
on top of the incredible stories they told of their opportunities to share Christ with the people in the part of the world, two things really stuck with me about them...
the first being that they have not stopped their ministry (at home in the US or in Africa) just because they are old. john piper talks in "don't waste your life" about how the purpose of life is not to retire in florida and spend all our time playing golf, or bingo, or riding around in a big boat. in fact, if that is what we are working towards then we have missed the whole point entirely...and we have wasted our chance.
one of my greatest fears is waking up 50 years down the road living in materialistic suburbia and wondering where the heck the years have gone and what do i have to show for them? last year, getting diagnosed with cancer certainly bumped this up on my priority list. i had to really look at my life and ask how i was letting the Lord use my time and my talents in case my chance was almost up. now that i am CANCER FREE :) my constant prayer is that i would not waste the life the Lord has chosen to bless me with.
these two missionaries are perfect examples of what christians should be spending our time doing...and stop using our age (being "too young" or "too old") as an excuse. these two faithful servants are finishing their race well. i hope we do the same.
the other thing about them was their relationship with one another. the husband stumbled through several stories while his wife interjected with comments to correct him or clarify...not in a rude or condescending way...more like she was helping him to get it all out...encouraging him along. when she interrupted him, he didn't get irritated or frustrated, just humbly acknowledged his confusion or mistake and looked gratefully at her for her assistance with a smile. when her time came to speak, he proudly introduced her and let his wife tell her own stories.
....you could just tell that they really loved each other i guess. that they had endured incredible hardships together and they really needed one another's help. each had their own strengths to help support the other. it was awesome.
and in 50 years i hope i have that kind of love. i hope you do too.
on top of the incredible stories they told of their opportunities to share Christ with the people in the part of the world, two things really stuck with me about them...
the first being that they have not stopped their ministry (at home in the US or in Africa) just because they are old. john piper talks in "don't waste your life" about how the purpose of life is not to retire in florida and spend all our time playing golf, or bingo, or riding around in a big boat. in fact, if that is what we are working towards then we have missed the whole point entirely...and we have wasted our chance.
one of my greatest fears is waking up 50 years down the road living in materialistic suburbia and wondering where the heck the years have gone and what do i have to show for them? last year, getting diagnosed with cancer certainly bumped this up on my priority list. i had to really look at my life and ask how i was letting the Lord use my time and my talents in case my chance was almost up. now that i am CANCER FREE :) my constant prayer is that i would not waste the life the Lord has chosen to bless me with.
these two missionaries are perfect examples of what christians should be spending our time doing...and stop using our age (being "too young" or "too old") as an excuse. these two faithful servants are finishing their race well. i hope we do the same.
the other thing about them was their relationship with one another. the husband stumbled through several stories while his wife interjected with comments to correct him or clarify...not in a rude or condescending way...more like she was helping him to get it all out...encouraging him along. when she interrupted him, he didn't get irritated or frustrated, just humbly acknowledged his confusion or mistake and looked gratefully at her for her assistance with a smile. when her time came to speak, he proudly introduced her and let his wife tell her own stories.
....you could just tell that they really loved each other i guess. that they had endured incredible hardships together and they really needed one another's help. each had their own strengths to help support the other. it was awesome.
and in 50 years i hope i have that kind of love. i hope you do too.
Sunday, February 25, 2007
freedom
i don't have cancer anymore.
last week was a whirlwind of prayer, tests, scary inconclusive results, and more tests. but as of 3:30 on friday, i am cancer free. cancer FREE. i am still processing this.
the Lord is so gracious...funny...but gracious. after leaving community group on tuesday night, he really was speaking to me about what it really means when he says "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom" (2 Corinthians 3:17)...reading through Isaiah 11 when it talks about the spirit of the Lord is the spirit of rest in the Lord, of wisdom, counsel, might, power, understanding, fear of the Lord, and delight in the Lord. Okay so since we have the Holy Spirit then we have all these things..and we have freedom when we are in the Spirit...what does that mean? it means we are FREE despite our circumstances. when i feel the need to just get out in the openness of God's creation or feel the urge to just pick up and leave, the Spirit provides the joy of this freedom even when sitting in our offices (or cubicles for some of you) or in a big white claustrophobic tube in the hospital. gosh this just blew my mind for some reason the other night.
the Lord was gracious enough to provide me comfort to be okay with finding out whether I had cancer or that I didn't have cancer. Good...I was able to trust in the Lord for those things. What I was not prepared for was the Lord telling me that it wasn't choice 1 or choice 2...but secret door number 3: learning to be patient and wait on the Lord and his perfect timing! How little my brain understands the ways of the Lord! He had to stretch me just a little bit more..just a little bit farther with something completely unexpected.
Isaiah 26: 3-8
3 You will keep in perfect peace
him whose mind is steadfast,
because he trusts in you.
4 Trust in the LORD forever,
for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal.
5 He humbles those who dwell on high,
he lays the lofty city low;
he levels it to the ground
and casts it down to the dust.
6 Feet trample it down—
the feet of the oppressed,
the footsteps of the poor.
7 The path of the righteous is level;
O upright One, you make the way of the righteous smooth.
8 Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws,
we wait for you; your name and renown
are the desire of our hearts.
The Lord is so faithful to me....and has been for the past year and a half. May the Lord bless you with a spirit of FREEDOM today. I love ya'll more than you know!
last week was a whirlwind of prayer, tests, scary inconclusive results, and more tests. but as of 3:30 on friday, i am cancer free. cancer FREE. i am still processing this.
the Lord is so gracious...funny...but gracious. after leaving community group on tuesday night, he really was speaking to me about what it really means when he says "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom" (2 Corinthians 3:17)...reading through Isaiah 11 when it talks about the spirit of the Lord is the spirit of rest in the Lord, of wisdom, counsel, might, power, understanding, fear of the Lord, and delight in the Lord. Okay so since we have the Holy Spirit then we have all these things..and we have freedom when we are in the Spirit...what does that mean? it means we are FREE despite our circumstances. when i feel the need to just get out in the openness of God's creation or feel the urge to just pick up and leave, the Spirit provides the joy of this freedom even when sitting in our offices (or cubicles for some of you) or in a big white claustrophobic tube in the hospital. gosh this just blew my mind for some reason the other night.
the Lord was gracious enough to provide me comfort to be okay with finding out whether I had cancer or that I didn't have cancer. Good...I was able to trust in the Lord for those things. What I was not prepared for was the Lord telling me that it wasn't choice 1 or choice 2...but secret door number 3: learning to be patient and wait on the Lord and his perfect timing! How little my brain understands the ways of the Lord! He had to stretch me just a little bit more..just a little bit farther with something completely unexpected.
Isaiah 26: 3-8
3 You will keep in perfect peace
him whose mind is steadfast,
because he trusts in you.
4 Trust in the LORD forever,
for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal.
5 He humbles those who dwell on high,
he lays the lofty city low;
he levels it to the ground
and casts it down to the dust.
6 Feet trample it down—
the feet of the oppressed,
the footsteps of the poor.
7 The path of the righteous is level;
O upright One, you make the way of the righteous smooth.
8 Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws,
we wait for you; your name and renown
are the desire of our hearts.
The Lord is so faithful to me....and has been for the past year and a half. May the Lord bless you with a spirit of FREEDOM today. I love ya'll more than you know!
Monday, February 19, 2007
things that are funny to me...
riding in elevators. we have one at work, and if someone else steps in that you don't know...or know well...i can feel the air get thick with uncomfortableness and the awkward silence that follows till someone gets off.
people can be completely silent for the whole ride, then they'll say "goodbye" or "have a good day" right before they step off. we can only speak when we know we can escape quickly.
it makes me laugh.
maybe because we all subconsciously feel the need to face forward so it would be strange to turn around and talk to the person?
maybe we feel like its not enough personal space and we wouldn't be able to back away from the person since you're trapped in a box?
i don't know. but it is darn funny, let me tell you.
people can be completely silent for the whole ride, then they'll say "goodbye" or "have a good day" right before they step off. we can only speak when we know we can escape quickly.
it makes me laugh.
maybe because we all subconsciously feel the need to face forward so it would be strange to turn around and talk to the person?
maybe we feel like its not enough personal space and we wouldn't be able to back away from the person since you're trapped in a box?
i don't know. but it is darn funny, let me tell you.
Friday, February 16, 2007
starting to lose it.....
i think i washed my hair 3 times in a row this morning.....and a couple of other days this week.
it could have been more than that or maybe it was just twice...
but it was definately more than once.
i am so tired...i just zone out and can't remember if i have already done it, or if i have just thought about doing it. weird i know.
it could have been more than that or maybe it was just twice...
but it was definately more than once.
i am so tired...i just zone out and can't remember if i have already done it, or if i have just thought about doing it. weird i know.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
valen'times' (that was for wimbo)
i love you.
ephesians 3: 14- 19
When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
ephesians 3: 14- 19
When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
i think this just hit me today.
i think the hardest thing about adjusting from being in school to working is this:
...it doesn't end.
there is not really a goal to reach for. no exam. no semester completed. no break. if you actually finish a project, then that just means you move on to the next thing on your never-ending to do list. another table to wait on. another person to call. (or for me, another post-it note on my desk) it just goes on and on and on forever.
you had better like your job.
most days, i do.
...it doesn't end.
there is not really a goal to reach for. no exam. no semester completed. no break. if you actually finish a project, then that just means you move on to the next thing on your never-ending to do list. another table to wait on. another person to call. (or for me, another post-it note on my desk) it just goes on and on and on forever.
you had better like your job.
most days, i do.
Friday, February 09, 2007
how you "know"....?
good song about our constant analyzation of whether a person is "the one" or not.....and how we question if there is someone out there that God has created who is better for us. you know how people say when you are with the person you are going to marry, you just "know." i don't know how you "know." sometimes i think we are looking for a perfect person....and that doesn't exist...well except for Jesus. my dad told me once that "loving a person is a choice...a commitment. you may not always feel like loving someone, but you choose too anyway."
when you really choose to love someone, (and you don't entertain the thought that they owe you something)...you are learning how to serve and encourage another human being. if you are worrying about what they are giving you (or not giving you), then eventually you'll be very unsatisfied and probably bitter. they are going to disappoint you. and tick you off. but if we would stop thinking about ourselves for one minute and think about them first, then that would solve a good bit of the problem right there. just a thought.
All At Once -The Fray
There are certain people you just keep coming back to
She is right in front of you
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now she's in question
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Looking for the right one you line up the world to find
Where no questions cross your mind
But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt
Much longer for you to sort it out
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it,
Maybe it's all you're running from,
Perfection will not come
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes
We'd never know what's wrong without the pain
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it
Maybe it's all you're running from
Perfection will not come
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you had her maybe you lost her to another
To another
when you really choose to love someone, (and you don't entertain the thought that they owe you something)...you are learning how to serve and encourage another human being. if you are worrying about what they are giving you (or not giving you), then eventually you'll be very unsatisfied and probably bitter. they are going to disappoint you. and tick you off. but if we would stop thinking about ourselves for one minute and think about them first, then that would solve a good bit of the problem right there. just a thought.
All At Once -The Fray
There are certain people you just keep coming back to
She is right in front of you
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now she's in question
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Looking for the right one you line up the world to find
Where no questions cross your mind
But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt
Much longer for you to sort it out
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it,
Maybe it's all you're running from,
Perfection will not come
And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes
We'd never know what's wrong without the pain
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it
Maybe it's all you're running from
Perfection will not come
Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you had her maybe you lost her to another
To another
Friday, February 02, 2007
in the home stretch
a few more weeks folks.
i'm now officially off my medicine and on a "low iodine" diet (which = nothing containing salt, dairy products, eggs, soy products, seafood, canned foods or drinks, cured meats, or Red Dye #3...and no i'm not kidding about the last one) for the next 2-3 weeks until my blood shows i'm ready for my scan.
and then.........
we will know. one way or the other.
i'm ready to be done.
and when i am....time to party!!!!
i'm now officially off my medicine and on a "low iodine" diet (which = nothing containing salt, dairy products, eggs, soy products, seafood, canned foods or drinks, cured meats, or Red Dye #3...and no i'm not kidding about the last one) for the next 2-3 weeks until my blood shows i'm ready for my scan.
and then.........
we will know. one way or the other.
i'm ready to be done.
and when i am....time to party!!!!
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
gettin old
today i saw an elderly man in walmart with an old fashioned walkman and headphones on, hobbling/dancing around and singing pretty loudly. he did not care one bit that people were staring at him...or that he looked like he was insane (maybe he was?). he was jammin' and smiling and singing. he had a twinkle in his eye. he looked happy.
it made me smile. i wanted to ask what he was listening to that made him want to dance and sing in walmart. it must have been something good. and i like that music can make people do things like that.
i spend a lot of my day hanging out with old people, or talking about old people, or thinking about old people. pretty much my job is to make sure they are happy and to find them a good volunteer friend. unfortunately, a lot of the old people are not happy. they are bitter and grumpy and ornery. and i don't want to be like that.
i hope to be like the old man at walmart...i hope i don't care one bit what people think of me...i hope i am happy with a twinkle in my eye...even if it means i have to be a little crazy.
it made me smile. i wanted to ask what he was listening to that made him want to dance and sing in walmart. it must have been something good. and i like that music can make people do things like that.
i spend a lot of my day hanging out with old people, or talking about old people, or thinking about old people. pretty much my job is to make sure they are happy and to find them a good volunteer friend. unfortunately, a lot of the old people are not happy. they are bitter and grumpy and ornery. and i don't want to be like that.
i hope to be like the old man at walmart...i hope i don't care one bit what people think of me...i hope i am happy with a twinkle in my eye...even if it means i have to be a little crazy.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
beautiful words
"For thus says the Lord, the Holy one of Israel, 'In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength'...For a people shall dwell in Zion, in Jerusalem; you shall weep no more. He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry. As soon as he hears it, he answers you. And though the Lord give you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, yet your Teacher will not hide himself anymore, but your eyes shall see your Teacher. And your ears shall hear a word behind you saying, 'This is the way, walk in it,' when you turn to the right or turn to the left...Moreover, the light of the moon will be as the light of the sun, and the light of the sun will be sevenfold, as the light of seven days, in the day when the Lord binds up the brokenness of his people, and heals the wounds inflicted by his blow...You shall have a song as in the night when a holy feast is kept, and the gladness of heart, as when one sets out to the sound of the flute to go to the mountain of the Lord, to the Rock of Israel. And the Lord will cause his majestic voice to be heard..."
passages from Isaiah 30
passages from Isaiah 30
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Roundhouse kick to the face....
ever since someone sent me the cancer quote about chuck norris' tears...i have been a fan. so i found this really interesting:
"Chuck Norris' first column for WorldNetDaily consisted of yet another response. It began similarly to the above quote from chucknorris.com, but then disclaimed Norris' own prowess in favor of God and Jesus Christ.
In response to "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.", Norris said It's funny. It's cute. But here's what I really think about the theory of evolution: It's not real. It is not the way we got here. In fact, the life you see on this planet is really just a list of creatures God has allowed to live. We are not creations of random chance. We are not accidents. There is a God, a Creator, who made you and me. We were made in His image, which separates us from all other creatures.By the way, without him, I don't have any power. But with Him, the Bible tells me, I really can do all things – and so can you.[2]
In response to "Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.", Norris said
"There was a man whose tears could cure cancer or any other disease, including the real cause of all diseases – sin. His blood did. His name was Jesus, not Chuck Norris.If your soul needs healing, the prescription you need is not Chuck Norris' tears, it's Jesus' blood."
who knew chuck norris was a christian? not me.
"Chuck Norris' first column for WorldNetDaily consisted of yet another response. It began similarly to the above quote from chucknorris.com, but then disclaimed Norris' own prowess in favor of God and Jesus Christ.
In response to "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.", Norris said It's funny. It's cute. But here's what I really think about the theory of evolution: It's not real. It is not the way we got here. In fact, the life you see on this planet is really just a list of creatures God has allowed to live. We are not creations of random chance. We are not accidents. There is a God, a Creator, who made you and me. We were made in His image, which separates us from all other creatures.By the way, without him, I don't have any power. But with Him, the Bible tells me, I really can do all things – and so can you.[2]
In response to "Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.", Norris said
"There was a man whose tears could cure cancer or any other disease, including the real cause of all diseases – sin. His blood did. His name was Jesus, not Chuck Norris.If your soul needs healing, the prescription you need is not Chuck Norris' tears, it's Jesus' blood."
who knew chuck norris was a christian? not me.
Saturday, January 13, 2007
breathing
soooo.....
2006 was a little rough.
okay a lot rough. it started weird and ended weird. honestly, i'm glad its over, although i learned a WHOLE lot.
I experienced God in ways I didn't know was possible. I learned what it means to be loved well by your family and friends...and how everyone needs love like that. really and truly... if you are primarily concerned with loving other people (which means not thinking about ourselves so much)....it solves a lot of problems and answers a lot of questions. you want what is best for them....and whats best for them is more of Jesus.
despite all that...sometimes you just need a break...a little normalcy. and i feel like i have that for the moment.
i spent 2006 on a field on landmines. its like i was holding my breath for a whole year, afraid that if i relaxed then one more thing was going to explode under my feet.
i can breathe again.
my mom called me on the morning of new years day just to tell me that she thought 2006 "sucked" and 2007 was going to be "fabulous."
i think it will be.
2006 was a little rough.
okay a lot rough. it started weird and ended weird. honestly, i'm glad its over, although i learned a WHOLE lot.
I experienced God in ways I didn't know was possible. I learned what it means to be loved well by your family and friends...and how everyone needs love like that. really and truly... if you are primarily concerned with loving other people (which means not thinking about ourselves so much)....it solves a lot of problems and answers a lot of questions. you want what is best for them....and whats best for them is more of Jesus.
despite all that...sometimes you just need a break...a little normalcy. and i feel like i have that for the moment.
i spent 2006 on a field on landmines. its like i was holding my breath for a whole year, afraid that if i relaxed then one more thing was going to explode under my feet.
i can breathe again.
my mom called me on the morning of new years day just to tell me that she thought 2006 "sucked" and 2007 was going to be "fabulous."
i think it will be.
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