free at last

i have been let out of my room!
i still have to be careful until i get scanned tomorrow about washing my hands, staying away from people, etc. but starting tomorrow i can rejoin society :)
(which means dad can stop running around singing "danger! she's radioactive!..." and mom can stop refering to me as her "little glow-worm")



and, hopefully in about 3 weeks (after i start my thyroid medicine and it adjusts), i will be normal aly once again.



my time in seclusion was very....spiritually...enlightening ?....i would say.
i went into it with the expectant attitude of hearing from God, and he certainly did not fail to show up (which, when we slow down enough to actually listen to him and be quiet...he can reveal some really cool things).
these past 3 days, i have done a LOT of reading....the Word, books, my journals, sermon notes......from the past year or so of my life...listening to music...and praying and listening for God to bring me purpose and understanding from this past year and for my life now that I am hopefully getting better.
which he did.
i threw out a lot of lies and insecurities and confusion that i wrote and believed about others...and God...and myself. they went into that little radioactive trashcan and are probably already burned up along with everything else i touched :) it was fabulously... freeing.


so....my spirit and body are healing together i guess.

my mom and i recently talked about the fact that i haven't been normal, non-medicated, not-sick ...Aly... in about a year.
a year.
that is a long long time to be gone. i have struggled this year in sorting out what is really my personality and what is a medicated strange version of myself.

*i have extremely loving close friends (both new and old) and family that have loved me and suffered alongside this big year of changes for me. i love you all for your prayers and understanding and patience through the tiredness, the tears, and the medicine. you know who you are and i want you to know i love you.*

but i know it has taken everything this past year to rip off some much needed layers of....well....crap...to be honest. i don't question anything that has happened to me because God has shown me numerous times this year how these hard things have been really....GOOD.
and God has blessed me INCREDIBLY by providing these insane experiences to teach me some very good things about Him, about others, and about myself....and my time of intense solitude provided me time with to reflect on these things. i don't regret them.

in about 3 weeks i'll be back. some of you that i have met recently have never even known the real Aly.
i miss her.
but she's coming back and "better than ever" haha.
i can't wait. :)